Turning Tables

“So I won't let you close enough to hurt me,
No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me.
I cant give you the heart you think you gave me,
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables.
To turning tables.”
-- Adele


Remember those walls I was talking about? As of now, they are stronger than ever. There isn’t a big event that caused them to be reinforced. I just felt like maybe, as time went by, they were dilapidating a tad bit.

What are with these walls? Geeze!

I hate them. I really do. But I’m so…scared. Scared to take them down. Scared of what might happen if I allow myself to love ANYONE. Scared of what might happen to my future if I do. Scared of what might happen to who I identify as myself as.

I just can’t seem to overcome that fear. In complete and utter sincerity, I haven’t the foggiest who I am without it. What I might become.

And I couldn’t stand myself if I became one of those co-dependent women that have to have a man to feel complete. I would go mad.

But don’t misunderstand me, I have nothing against women (or men) like that. I just don’t ever want to join rank with them. Because I know what I am, who I am, and what I plan to be. A man would only get in the way of the things that I want and cripple me as a very outspoken, independent individual.

On the other hand…A man might help me along my journey -- what am I saying? That’s crazy talk!

Women do not need a significant other to make or break them. All they need is the knowledge of self reliance, and we strong and empowered women can accomplish more than anyone ever believed we could.


 ~Elle est Toujours Sans Amour~